Is Steve Harvey’s 90 Day Rule Antiquated?

This morning Steve Harvey appeared on CBS Morning Show to discuss his new movie Think Like a Man whish is based on his book. In the book he talks about the 90 Day Rule. Harvey bases this on when you start a job you generally have to work for 90 days before you are eligible for the benefits. He says that women should wait 90 days before they start giving up their benefit package. Morning host Gayle King said she was asking her 20something staff members about the 90 day rule and they said that they thought his thinking was antiquated. They said 3 dates was more in line with their thinking. Three dates. Harvey said he wrote the book for his daughters and he stood by the 90 days. What do you think is Harvey spot on or is he out of step? Tell me what you think.

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  • diaryofasagittarius  On April 9, 2012 at 2:43 pm

    Well I think it is. I don’t think people wait that long anymore. If there was a time they ever did.

  • elogam  On April 9, 2012 at 4:50 pm

    It depends on what you’re looking for. If a deep, committed relationship is what you want, 90 days isn’t asking too much. If you just want to “hook up” for a quick thrill, than the 90 days is contrary to meeting your goal. Granted, quick thrills can turn into long-term relationships, but the odds of finding a man who’s committed to you for the long haul are better if you set boundaries and make him win your heart. (ladies, don’t take this as a sign that you can be aloof and distant for about 89 days. You need to court and win HIS heart too. Show him you’re worth the wait. Of risk losing him around day 40.)

  • swandiver  On April 10, 2012 at 4:54 am

    I think the 90 day rule not only is antiquated but plays into a very dangerous thought process that perpetuates the madonna/whore syndrome.

    My worth as a woman is not tied into my vagina and how I chose to use it. I am not “damaged goods” because I choose to have sex when I want to and whether I sleep with you within the first day or the first year, you are not justified to treat me with any less respect.

    If you would give up on a good woman in every other way just because she slept with you sooner than your artificial timeline thinks is proper, the problem is with you and not her.

    • Bill  On April 10, 2012 at 6:00 pm

      So it is a very dangerous thought process for me to be dubious about at least the judgement if not character of a woman who would jump in the sack with me on our first date, a point at which she probably wouldn’t even know my middle name, or even if I have one? I’m just asking.

    • elogam  On April 11, 2012 at 1:57 am

      Swandiver, either I’m not understanding you or you’re confusing what the 90-day rule is all about. We (men) don’t view you as “damaged goods” because you’ve had sex, but their perception of whether you’re a long term interest or a “quick hit” can be determined by the effort it takes to close the deal. I don’t know if you’ve read Harvey’s book but he delves into how men think of a woman. Men and women think differently, and his intent is to show women who are looking for a long term relationship how to achieve that. By all means, if you choose to have sex on the first night, and you can turn that into a long-term relationship, more power to you.He’s just sugesting ways to improve your chances of success.

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